I don’t know how it happened. Or even what happened. All I know is one year passed, then two, then three… Each year would begin and end with the same difficult to embrace reality: I hadn’t released any new music.
That’s over 150 weeks, in which every Tuesday I would watch (and somewhat listen) as thousands of songs came out. I felt lost at sea, with no engine, no sails, just paddles… watching hundreds of other ships sail off into the horizon one by one. But I kept paddling.
Back in my days in Milwaukee as a young inspired artist with tons of energy, creative innocence and “know-it-all” ignorance, I used to get mad when my favorite artists took a long time to come out with music. I remember when Brian Mcknight’s 2nd album (if I remember correctly) was delayed. “Come on man, how hard is it to put out music?” I thought. “This is what you do for a living. If I wasn’t in school I’d be putting out an album every year.” My passion was sincere yet naive. I had yet to learn how challenging and painstaking it is to persevere in continuing to write, record and release innovative quality music in the midst of life’s variables of ups and downs. Great art comes with a high price. So does following your calling.
So here I was, three years of silence. And the longer the silence went on the harder it was to break it. I had spent years working very hard to break through walls to get to where I was, yet here was another mountain in front of me. And this one was different. It felt like no matter what I tried nothing was working. I know what having momentum on your side feels like, which makes not having it all the more grueling.
Early 2014 I started recording new songs and performing them at shows. I figured I would release them that summer. But there wasn't a system yet in place to properly market those songs. And with no marketing strategy there was no deadline. And without a deadline songs never get finished. I was traveling a lot, and schedules weren’t lining up. Not to mention I’m a recovering perfectionist. Fear and shame frequently work their way into my thinking and feeling. I wrestle believing God’s truth about me at times, and settle for lies. Honestly, it's hard for me to be vulnerable because B.Reith is a brand, and i benefit if you buy into it. But my name is Brian. I am a human being. I am incredibly gifted by an amazing God. But I struggle with a list of character defects that I could blog about for days.
So this makes me a perfect candidate for God to use and show off how amazing He is. His grace truly is sufficient, and His timing is perfect. I have a lot of regrets. But it doesn’t matter. Because I’m here, right now, communicating this to you, with a smile on my face (you’re gonna have to trust me on that). I've learned so much in the past three years. I truly believe I'm going somewhere, and I want you to come along with me. The journey starts here, picks back up right where I left off. And since making music is what I'm best at, well I figured I'd start by giving you a free song. And non-coincidentally it's entitled "Don't Forget About Me."